Nostalgia is awesome

Hello all

 

I want to tell you about the brilliance that is nostalgia. It's nostalgia that has reconnected me recently with a lot of stuff from my younger years.

I recently downloaded Resident Evil 4 on the Playstation 3 network, ok, it's only about 6/7 years old, but it's got me started on this route through nostaliga. I forgot how awesome the game is, and not to forget the difficulties of running around the game for the very first time on a mad scramble for ammo. Or how about the "flash grenade? fuck the flash grenade," and selling it to the market guy.... only to then say no more than five minutes later realise that it could have been quite handy as you're facing an enemy that can be defeated with one flash grenade......or about 50 handgun bullets.

I love the Resident Evil series and as soon as I get bored with RE:4 having gained every weapon with infinite ammo, I'm straight onto the very first game.....the only one in the series I have never actually completed.

Anyway, away from nostalgically killing the undead of Las Plagas sufferers...

I often get nostalgic about stuff, mainly getting into conversations at work about kids TV shows. Amy, who sits opposite me, is around my age, so we share a common television experience growing up....and our conversations that revolve around kids shows turn into a top-trumps of tv shows. Names such as SuperTed, Sooty or the ever popular Dastardly and Muttley.

I don't have a lot of stuff from my childhood on DVD, but I don't have Visionaries, a show with one of the most epic theme tunes ever......don't believe me??? CLICK HERE. Other than that I don't really have a lot, although I'd love to have the kids TV shows I used to watch on DVD........it seems odd almost talking about owning a kids TV show on DVD and it not seeming weird.....not to be anyway.

The only bad thing about nostalgia is that one occasions you see that a movie you loved back in the day is on TV, or at Blockbuster, or whatever, you set aside time to watch it because you're excited......90 minutes to 2 hours later and you're wondering why you ever used to love that film. I can't really think of any specific examples at the moment, but I'm sure you get the idea.

And finally I will add this little blog with a quote from a song called "Free to Wear Sunscreen" by Baz Luhrmann......

Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
Wishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off
Painting over the ugly parts and recycling for more than it's worth

Five days on......

Well it's not five days since I made the decision to close theimps.ka and the bizarre thing is that no-one on the forum seems to have noticed that I've put the announcement that the site will close on the website. To be honest if I could close it now, I would do. Unfortunately I have to wait for two weeks after the most recent article was written before the site automatically closes down, hence why I'm put the closing date as the 29th.

In a strange way I will miss it. For 8 and a half years I have spent building up that website and it has opened up a lot more doors for me, but the reason I loved it most was that I was able to wind up fans of other teams, and even so much my own team.

The amount of times I was told I knew nothing about football, only to then be proven right was quite amusing. For example, I predicted Aldershot to finish in the 2009/10 Playoffs and got called an idiot from most people and that I had lost my mind............they made the Playoffs. Another example being that I did an interview for a Stevenage website and said that they would beat us, I got slagged off by a lot of Lincoln fans and got called an idiot for saying they'd beat us....final score.....Lincoln 0 Stevenage 1.

It always amused me how I turned out to be right 95% of the time and yet I was constantly getting criticised by those who ended up being completely wrong, or even better, those who slagged off my opinion on certain players before then noticing the same flaws themselves and then agreeing.

I also used to love the feedback I used to get from other teams fans.....for example....Shrewsbury Town fans and their lovely opinion. Granted, most of the time my articles wouldn't be written to wind people up, but occasionally I would just add to articles that they found offensive and purposefully add stuff to annoy them.

Oh well, I've moved on now, but I do hope that the people who read the website see that bit at the top of the page and aren't surprised when the site closes next week.

2012, a year for change?

I'd like to start this blog with a quote from Star Trek (yes, I am a geek) : "You can settle for a less than ordinary life. Or do you feel like you were meant for something better? Something special?"

I mentioned in another blog that I am looking at my future and for the first time in a long time it's very cloudy. 2011 has seen a lot of changes for my plans for the future. Something I had planned for my entire life is no longer happening, well, when I say no longer happening, it's on an indefintite hold at the moment, although I'm not ruling it out. I also went out of England for the first time since I was 11 to somewhere other than Wales, the country of Scotland. That day was the start of a desire to live somewhere else during my life, so let's look at the candidates (in no particular order)

Tromso (Norway)

Tromso is a town/city in the upper area of Norway. It sits in at the bottom of a mountain and is exceptionally beautiful at night. You only have to look at the picture on the right to see why I would be interested in moving there, it looks absolutely astonishing.

There's also a football team there that I sort of follow the results of.

It's also a good city for music as one of my favourite musicians comes from there (Lene Marlin).

Canada

Well my best friend lives in Canada, so that is automatically a massive bonus when looking into a place to move to in the future. It would be a great opportunity to see her on a semi-regular basis, rather than just being restricted at the moment to internet conversations.

The main issue with Canada would be where to actually go? I don't really know enough about Canada other than a town called Slave Lake in Alberta, and from what I hear, it's a bit of a dive. There is always the bigger cities, such as Edmonton, Calgary, Ottawa, Toronto, etc, but I'm not entirely sure, probably something I would need to look into properly.

Canada is another beautiful country with a lot of mountain ranges, forests and various other natural wonders, including the northern lights (which I can also see in Norway might I add). It's also a great mix (from what I can tell) of a big country like America and a smaller country such as England.

America

The final choice would be the United States of America. I think it's safe to say that you never have to read a book about America to see what it's like. Their media (such as films and music) dominates the world media scene and you feel like you've seen all the sites without having ever gone to the country itself.

Much like Canada, I have a great friend who lives in America, so it would be a great opportunity to see her on a more regular basis as well.

I'm not going to lie, until recently I had virtually no interest in going to America and if I'm having problems picking a potential place to live in Canada, I'm screwed in America. Every state has at least 2/3 cities that virtually everyone has heard of, and each with it's own unique aspects. For example, in New York you've got the Empire State Building, Statue of Liberty and Times Square. In Washington there's all the memorials to former presidents, as well as the Smithsonian museum, and over on the west coast you have places like the San Francisco bridge (Golden Gate Bridge if memory serves me correctly).

I certainly wouldn't be spoilt for choice over in America, let's put it that way. The size would also scare me. I was overwhelmed when I moved to Nottingham from Lincoln and that's only five times bigger, some cities in America are five times bigger than London, and problem much bigger. I would more than likely end up getting lost.

 

So there are my three choices, I think realistically it's going to be between Canada and America due to my friends that live over there, and that's assuming anything happens at all.

I would love to go to America and/or Canada in 2012. Luckily my trip to Ukraine got cancelled so I certainly have the time to do it, so I guess we'll wait and see. I think unlike when I moved to Nottingham, I would like to get a chance to get to know the place I am potentially going to move to....especially as all three options are in another country.





More to life than football

I have been a football supporter since I was about 6 years old. I have played and watched football before that with little or passing interest, but then my brother-in-law got me into it.

I grew up as a Manchester United fan (which, by the way, given that I started supporting them in 1990, before they started winning anything, doesn't make me a glory supporter), which added to a diverse selection of teams in my family. My brother supported Liverpool, my brother-in-law was a Chelsea fan, my half-sister (who I didn't meet until I was 12) was a Notts County fan and most of the rest of my family were fans of Norwich City.

It wasn't until 2002/3 that I started becoming passionate about football though. The 2002/3 season was brilliant for me personally, I was going to watch Lincoln City on a regular basis and ended up seeing all 53 games in a season where City started as relegation favourites and yet made the Playoff Final.

Skip forward nine years and it's now coming to the end of 2011 and in that time I've missed just two Lincoln games, but, and I would never have imagined myself saying this a few years ago, I am at the point where I have a general feeling of apathy towards football.

I rarely celebrate when Lincoln City score, and often find myself sitting away from the rest of the Lincoln fans....mainly because I can't stand most of them. At away games I can be found in the stand where the home supporters sit.....mainly because the view is better and at the end of the day, if I'm going to watch a shite football match then I'm at least going to watch it from a place where I can at least see it well.

In all fairness I have had a feeling of apathy towards Lincoln for a while, but even then I was still celebrating whenever I was watching the TV and United scored......and before someone says it.....I'm not sure if you've seen the ticket prices at Old Trafford, but for the ticket, to get there, food, programme, etc, would be around £100 per game, whereas a Lincoln game is considerably less. I do go to Old Trafford whenever I get the chance, but not often. Anyway, yeah, I used to celebrate but now I don't even react.

What I've realised in recent years is that there's more to life than football. Don't get me wrong, I still love it and will still go whenever I can, but it's not at the point where I could easily miss a game and not actually be that bothered. I'm now 27 and I have started prioritising things and football just isn't a priority.

As I say, I'll still go if there's nothing else to do, but I wouldn't exactly be disappointed if I couldn't for whatever reason.

The one who left my heart on the floor.....

Well a lot of people have been curious what I'm going to be doing with my spare time now that I am not running internet forums and one of the answers is creative writing and art.

I had always been into creative writing, regularly writing poems and short stories when I was younger but I fell out of it as I was getting older. Last week at the college where I learn German I noticed a competition for creative writing and decided I would enter with a poem, or at least a sort of poem.

After listening to a few songs I was inspired to write one about a guy who runs into his ex-girlfriend and is unsure as to whether he should forgive her or not. This is only a first draft so I would love some feedback as to what I can improve on....especially as I rarely write poems these days.


The one who left my heart on the floor.....

It started at roughly midnight.
Or at least that's when I started to lose what was left of my mind
As I got served at the bar under neon lights.
The jukebox is playing some irrelevant and predictable song
It's telling me to forget what she did but I know that it just feels so wrong.
And then I see her, the one who I once loved
A vindictive and cerebral loathing to her false smile in my general direction.
And she's wearing that dress that reminds me of her vicious rejection.

She walks up and asks "how are you".
I can smell her perfume and I get visions of the memory of her lying naked in my arms.
She says that she's sorry and wants me to forgive her tonight
My emotions are in turmoil, my love and hate in an almighty fight

I'm polite, although I give the impression I don't care
My passionless exterior is hiding my desperate inside
She says she's sorry and touches the tattoo on my arm of my name and her's
And all these memories come flooding back like violent waves to my mind.
The curves of our bodies and our love that had became perfectly entwined,
I want to forgive her but the paranoia in my head just subtlely inclines,
And I feel hopeless and homeless in my own fragile insanity.

And so hours pass whilst I try to survive
My sanity is slipping and negative thoughts can only dance and thrive
She's dancing, she's drinking, she's living life one moment at a time
And whilst stood feet away my anger and loathing do nothing but rapidly climb.
I don't even want her, at least that's what I tell myself
But not matter how she hurts me I always want to go back for more.
She's my drug, she's my love, she's the one who leaves my heart on the floor

Then she left with someone even she doesn't know.
And in her vindictive way she made sure I saw her.
She looks right at me as if to say goodbye for good.
My heart falls faster than even she could have predicted
I realise at this moment that with her I am totally addicted.
I want her to be mine again but now it is too late
I want her to know that I forgive her, to give it one more go is my only desire
But yet again I got caught in my own emotional and vengeful crossfire

So there I am, alone on the dancefloor
I am broken and down and ready for the evening to end
Heartbroken in the corner, my emotions are too painful and sore.
It's too late that I have realised what might have been again
My paranoia played tricks on me that are completely and totally inhumane

And now I know that she has once again broken me in two.

So, another year gone....

Back when I was 16 I started a course at college that included several different qualifications, one of which was sociology. I don’t remember a lot about the course but the lecturer, a man called Rick Courtney (probably the teacher/lecturer who I respect most during my education) said something has stuck with me in the 11 years since, “When you’re younger you commonly fall out with people because of arguments. You’re a 5 year old and someone won’t let you use their red crayon, that’s your friendship over and done with there and then. When you’re older it’s a lack of interaction or communication which causes friendships to fall apart.”

You may be wondering why I have started this review of my 2011 with a quote from someone the majority won’t have heard of, well the reason is the pure turnover of friends I have had during 2011. By the time mid-July came around I had around 550 friends on Facebook, I would stress that not all of my friends are online, but I’m using Facebook friends as a contextual basis, then one night I had a conversation with one of my best friends, Jodi, changed everything.

I can’t really explain it but the conversation changed everything for me this year. It was during that conversation I realised that I only wanted friends who I actually didn’t see on a regular basis, such as Jodi or my American friend, Megan, on Facebook. My 550 quickly became around 130. Some people who I removed did not react well at all, even after I had stressed that it was just because I saw them on a regular basis and I only wanted people on Facebook who I saw less regularly, although I have since re-established a friendship with some of them since then.

I would stress that I don’t really class people from work as friends, not the majority anyway. To use another quote, “The people you work with are people you were just thrown together with. You know, you don't know them, it wasn't your choice, and yet you spend more time with them then you do your friends or your family. But probably all you've got in common is the fact that you walk around on the same bit of carpet for 8 hours a day.” I’ll leave it at that.

That’s not to say I haven’t been awkward this year and some friendships ending were not Facebook related in the slightest and were through my own fault.

Going back to my friend Jodi, a friend of mine for around 10 years and someone who I can’t praise highly enough. Whilst I was having issues with Faye, Maz and various others, she stuck by me all the way. Throughout all the issues I’ve had down the years, I can’t thank her enough for being awesome throughout our friendship, even if I times I have been “testing” …. putting it nicely.

Jodi was the person who this year was responsible for me not continuing with a plan I had been working towards since I was a young child. I can’t explain it but this year having her in my life on a regular basis made me reconsider a lot of things and one of the first things that went out of the door was that.

It’s just a shame that my two best friends, her and Megan, live a combined 8,000 miles (give or take) away from me. I am hoping to go on a big trip to both America and Canada in 2013 and I plan on seeing them both….assuming I haven’t pissed them off by them.

Megan’s another awesome friend. Unfortunately the distance has proved a bit of a stumbling block this year as she has been busy at her end…..whereas I have spent most evenings on Facebook…..how pathetic does that sound? Still, I love Megan because she is one of the few people who I know (along with Jodi) who I can have a conversation with for more than 5/10 minutes without getting completely bored.

I would like to end talking about my friends my talking about a girl who I became friends with but then we had a major falling out later on in the year. I'm not going to mention this girl by name but there was a moment in September where me and this girl became what I considered good friends, but thanks to the influence of others, that friendship ended. I was devastated at the time and thanks to people like Jodi and Megan, I was quickly able to get back on my feet, even now to the point where I don't feel sad at all about this person not being in my life anymore.

So away from friends, what else has been happening?

Well in May Lincoln City were finally relegated. It had been coming for several years and since then I have been rather passive on the fortunes of the club. Don’t get me wrong, I’d love to get promotion back and I am still going to games, but it is now at the point where I am not actually that fussed if I do have to miss a game for whatever reason.

Getting relegated does have it’s bonuses in a way. There are a LOT of new places to visit, towns and cities I have never visited before. In that sense going down wasn’t a bad thing, but I can see myself getting very tired, very quickly of some places such as Braintree, Nailsworth, Tamworth and Alfreton, although the latter set of scumbags are unlikely to be in the same division as us next season.

Speaking of new places, I did get to visit a new place earlier in the earlier. I haven’t let England a lot during my life, infact other than Wales and France on one occasion, I had never left England. During July I was given an opportunity to go to Scotland. Scotland’s a lovely country, granted some of the towns were what could best be described as a “shithole”, but in general the country was lovely.

It was quiet, even the motorways were quiet. We left England at about 11am after several hours in heavy traffic, getting to Scotland there was fuck all on the roads. There was also a small-town feel to everywhere. The town of Annan for example lists a “public telephone” as one of it’s main features. I would love to go back to Scotland in the future for a few days, what I’d do for a few days is another matter, but I’d love to go back.

The trip to Scotland has got me thinking about the future and how I am bored with England. I think I’ve seen near enough everything there is to see in England, everything worth seeing anywhere. I think I’m coming up to being ready to move on. I’d like to go travelling for a while or even live in a new country all together. I don't know where I'd like to live for an extended about of time, but in the near future I am hoping to visit America, Canada and Norway, so hopefully going there will help me decided at one point or another.

It has been a bizarre year in the sense that I started off knowing exactly what I wanted and now I have no clue, or at least not one to make a responsible decision on.

I have been learning German at college in the second half of the year, the course lasts for 3 years so hopefully by the end I’ll be good enough to hold a conversation there. As stated above I would like to go to America and Canada for a long visit, although both are fairly big, so the chances of me seeing everything worth seeing in either is very slim. The one thing I would not like is to go somewhere ridiculous hot. I can’t cope in the heat. Me + The Sun = Chaos

I also retired from football this year. I torn an ankle ligament (as you can tell from the picture, my ankle swelled up quite badly) in the summer and soon after returning I realised I just didn't want it anymore, so I decided to retire from the sport. Five months and I still haven't kicked a single football since.

So, other than a high turnover in friends, Scotland and potentially leaving the country, has anything interesting happened? Not that I can think of so I am going to end this look at 2011 so far here.