Mellowing out

Hello all,

I'm going to start this blog with a quote,

"Nathan, you're far nicer now. You used to be a bastard all of the time, then you were a bastard most of the time with a little bit of a goodness, then you were 50/50, then you were mostly good and now you're not a bastard at all," ....Amy from where I work.

That was followed up by omeone else from work saying I seem a lot happier these days and you know what, I am. I can't really explain it, I've just mellowed out over the last six or so months. It takes a lot to properly annoy me these days, and what's even more bizarre is that the stuff that used to really wind me up doesn't even bother me anymore. I have mellowed out. I'm just far more chilled and laid back than I was a few months ago and it's a good thing.

I can't really explain it, but over the last few months I have just become more relaxed about stuff. I don't really dwell on stuff for long periods of time anymore, which probably helps, and I no longer have a "best friend" who treats me like shit and is a self-centred little hypocrit, which probably helps. Maybe it's because I've accepted that I support a shit football team, or maybe it's just that I am now longer worrying about moving to either America or Canada. I can't really put a finger on it.

I'm just considerably happier these days than I used to be. In my last blog entry I had said that my life isn't on hold anymore, which is has been for a long time, and I no longer feel pressured to be a "performing monkey" for some "friends". I am satisfied, for the first time in a while, with how my life is progressing and although I only have one plan for the long term, that plan finally looks like it's going to be going ahead after 27 years of waiting.

I'm on the verge of moving to Newark (I'm moving to be closer to work), so it'll be nice to be on my 8-4 shifts and not having to wake up at 5:30 like I currently do.

For the first time in a long time, I can say that I am happy.