No Pepsi Max, a microscope up the nose and bikes

Hello all

It has been a while since I wrote a blog about my life so I just wanted to spare a few minutes and update those of you that care.

My throat in all of it's glory.

Right, I'll start with something that happened on Friday and that is my first foray into voice therapy, designed to turn my voice from masculine to feminine. I will remember this for years but not because it is the start of yet another part of the journey to become female, but rather having a microscope shoved up my nose and down into my throat.

I am pretty oblivious to pain, it takes a lot to make me even get uncomfortable, however, having a microscope shoved up my nose was quite frankly one of the most painful and uncomfortable things I have ever had to go through. It was not only uncomfortable, but it was ridiculously uncomfortable.

So there I am with a microscope up my down and I am then forced to sing happy birthday. Those who know me well know that I am absolutely hate that song, however, I sing it just because it would mean getting the microscope out of my nose.

The results were quite bizarre in many ways, afterall, as you tell by the screenshot on the right it looks like I have a creature stuck down my throat, but nope, it is supposed to look like that apparently. All went relatively well but then came some devastating news.....I am no longer allowed to drink Pepsi Max. It is rare to see me with a drink that isn't Pepsi Max or at least a Diet Coke (depending on where I am and what they serve), so you can imagine the panic that struck me at that point. Infact, it doesn't even stop at Pespi Max, it's any drink that has caffeine in it. If I intend for my voice to become more feminine then I will have to learn to drink other things, so since then I have been on water and orange juice, I suppose it's not that bad but I just miss Pespi Max.

It is yet another step I have taken towards becoming female and at the time of writing I have been on hormones for just shy of five months and I am relatively happy with the results so far. I have much softer skin than I had beforehand, the breasts have now developed to a size where they are noticeable if I wear a tight shirt (I still wear the fake breasts for the time being) and I am far more mild-mannered, taking a long time to get angry.

One side effect I am not keen on though is the weight-gain from the hormones. It was always inevitable that I was going to put on weight as obviously my body is gaining breasts and fat is being moved around, however, I wasn't expecting to put on as much as I have. Last year I lost 3 stone but had put a stone of that back on (which I think is only natural given that much weight loss in that small amount of time), however, since hormones I have put an extra six pounds on, so I have gotten my bike back out after seven/eight months.

I am not a fan of biking as my stamina has never been the best, however in many ways it is proving handy. I now get to work in half the time it used to take and I no longer get severe cramps at the back of my lowers legs when walking, and believe me, not having those anymore is a very, very good thing. It used to really hurt when I walked, some times into my 30 minute walk to work, I would get those cramps within minutes and it was torture getting to work.

But anyway. Other than that not a lot is really happening to be honest. I had a job interview in Aylesbury a few weeks ago for a role that is pretty much the same as what I do at Vodafone, just for considerably more money. I had my interview and fell in love with the location, but alas, it was not to be as I didn't make the second interview stage, with the two "finalists" both having experience in the specific industry to which I had applied. Oh well, at least it was nice to be considered for that type of role.

I still don't know what my future really holds, I still don't know what I want to do with the rest of my life but if you had said to me at the beginning of my time at Vodafone that I would there for four years then I wouldn't have believed you. I think I've now been at Vodafone nearly as long as I had been at every other permanent job combined, so almost four years is some achievement, and it brings a good level of security.

So I guess I will just have to leave it there really. I'm definitely glad that the football season is over as far as Lincoln are concerned as it was doing my nut in. Lincoln didn't get relegated, Man United won the title and Barnet went down, which was definitely long overdue.

I still generally dislike going to football but there is just something about it that makes you always want to go back. I am going to two more games this season, both Man United games and at the latter one (against Swansea) they will lift the title. It will be the last game I attend as a season ticket holder, so that means that it will end relatively well. When I bought the season ticket it was in hope that I would be watching them lift the title at the end of the season, so all in all it was definitely worth it. However, in many ways it was also a huge waste of money. I have only attended seven games (Galatasary, Tottenham, West Ham, Cluj, Sunderland, Southampton and Everton) so far, meaning that at maximum I will have only attended nine this season out of a possible 26 in all competitions, some games I have been able to sell onto other people, but the majority I have had to just take the loss. Although I am pleased it is ending well, it was a huge waste of money.

But anyway, I will leave it there and will hopefully talk to/see you all at some point.

Peace out!